Mistakes happen. They happen a lot in relationships. No matter how hard you might try, it’s so hard to be perfect in a relationship. Truthfully, it’s practically impossible. However, that doesn’t mean that all relationships are doomed as a result. Yes, love and relationships might be imperfect. But that doesn’t have to expect that no relationships could last. This is where the values of patience and understanding come in. So as long as you try to stay patient with the partner that you’re with, you are going to turn out fine.
After all, you have to be willing to acknowledge the fact that your partner isn’t always going to do the right thing. And what that means is that you have to develop a tolerance for their pitfalls and mistakes. Naturally, this means being able to give them second, third, or even fourth chances. However, you also have to make sure that they are worthy of it. Sometimes, it’s just a lot better for you to walk away from someone than to try to force the issue.
How do you know?
Of course, you might ask the question. How do you know? How can you be sure if the person you’re with is worthy of that second chance? How do you know if it would be more apt for you to walk away entirely? Well, if you’re asking yourself these questions, then you have come to the right place. Sometimes, you have to be honest with yourself about the state of your relationship. If you find that a lot of the things listed here apply to your partner, then maybe you should rethink being in this relationship.
Here are a few signs that the person you’re with isn’t worth giving a second chance to.
1. They refuse to accept responsibility for their actions.
They aren’t interested in owning up to their mistakes and shortcomings. In their eyes, they think they can do no wrong. They always seem like perfect creatures who always do the right thing. However, you know that they can be destructive in their thoughts, habits, and words.
2. They don’t apologize for their mistakes.
They don’t have any interest in apologizing to you. They don’t care about the fact that they’ve hurt you or done something wrong. Even when they know that they’ve screwed up, they would never want to admit that to you. They are just too proud to apologize for anything. They don’t want to give you that satisfaction or peace of mind.
3. They focus the attention on all of the shortcomings that you have had.
Instead of just acknowledging the fact that they’ve screwed up, they would instead highlight the fact that you’ve done them wrong. They would want to put the highlight on all the ways that you’ve screwed up to take the attention away from themselves.
4. They make you feel wrong about who you are.
They have a way of just making you feel wrong about being the person that you are. Instead of you feeling proud of yourself, they just put you down. They try to diminish and degrade whatever confidence you might have.
5. They tell you that your feelings are invalid.
They tell you that your feelings are entirely invalid. When you express displeasure at something that they’ve done, they tell you that you’re just overreacting. They wholly invalidate any thoughts, feelings, sentiments, or opinions that you might have of them.
6. They use your feelings of guilt against you.
They know that they have the power to make you feel guilty about whatever shortcomings you might have. And they know that they can use this against you as well. After all, they are masters of manipulation. And they are interested in getting you to do exactly what they want you to do regardless if it’s right for you or not.
7. They make the same mistakes over and over again.
No matter how bad it might make you feel, they aren’t shy about committing the same mistakes over and over again towards you. They prove their insensitivity, and they don’t care that their actions can have negative impacts on you.
As difficult as it might be to let someone you love go, it’s necessary sometimes. You have to love yourself before you love anyone else. After all, you always have to be the priority in your own life. That means that if someone isn’t treating you in the manner that you deserve, you need to dump this person altogether. You should always be looking after your well-being. And if someone ceases to add value to your life, it shouldn’t be too hard for you to decide to walk away from that individual.
Mom-to-be Pens Heartbreaking Note to Husband After his Sudden Death
A newlywed woman wrote a tearful letter to her dead husband in her sleep.
Shannen, her Lissel, who married her beloved in September 2022, is currently mourning the death of her beloved husband.
The couple have been together for five years. They got engaged in May 2021.
In December 2022, Shannen and Connor discovered that her girlfriend Lissel was pregnant. They all celebrated the good news with excitement.
But unfortunately Connor couldn’t even care for his pregnant wife for more than a few weeks and she passed away yesterday.
“It is with a heavy heart that I write these words. Her husband Connor died suddenly in her sleep yesterday morning,” Shannen wrote on Friday.
“Connor was the love of my life. He’s been the best husband, the best friend, the best family, the best fur baby daddy. It was planned to be.
She added that her late husband was an adrenaline junkie and he loved adventure. He had many hobbies and loved to be outdoors doing adventures on beaches and mountains.
“He loved surfing, he loved being in the water at the beach, he loved a coffee and a choccie, he was so much fun to travel with, to have a laugh with friends and family, he was always trying to live an exciting life that he was proud of, trying new things like fly fishing,” she wrote alongside a beautiful picture of herself and Connor on Facebook.
“He worked hard, he loved being creative with his art and music and he gave his whole heart to those he loved and had such a huge heart, empathy, and care for people he met.”
She added that Connor, who was supposed to turn 30 this year, was the `most rare` person she had ever met.
“I am so proud that I got to become his wife and spend 5 years, and 4 months with him. The memories that we have I will cherish forever and I will live the rest of my days reflecting on ways I can be more like him.”
She continued, “And when I welcome our baby into the world, he or she will be surrounded by everyone that loved him, to share memories about how beautiful of a person he was, and his memories will live on.”
Reading this, many people commented on Shannen`s post and offered their condolences. “My condolences to my beloved Shannen. Sending lots of love and strength,” she wrote.
“Shannen, I’m so sorry for your loss. He was such an amazing person and he loved you so much and was sending you all his love,” said another.
“I’m so sorry for the loss of your baby,” one-third commented.
“I’m so sorry that this happened to you too. It’s really heartbreaking to hear this news. Life can be so unfair,’ she chimed in.
“You are not alone. There is endless support around you to help you get through this.”
A GoFundMe was set up in Shannen’s name to cover the costs of Connor’s memorial service and to help Shannen during this difficult time.
To date, GoFundMe has raised him $26,065.
Share your thoughts:
During this difficult time, our hearts go out to Shannen his Lissel. You can help her out by donating to her GoFundMe. Let us know your thoughts in the comments.
8 Keys for Breaking Bad Habits!
Bad habits are behaviors that are detrimental to our physical, mental, or emotional well-being. They can range from minor actions like biting your nails or procrastinating, to more serious issues like smoking or overeating. Some common bad habits include:
- Overeating or undereating
- Smoking or other substance abuse
- Lack of exercise or physical activity
- Excessive alcohol consumption
- Negative self-talk or thinking
- Gossiping or speaking negatively about others
- Spending too much time on screens
- Spending or wasting money
- Interrupting or talking over others
Breaking bad habits can be difficult, but it is possible with the right mindset and strategies. Identifying the triggers and creating a plan to replace the bad habit with a positive behavior can be helpful in overcoming the habit. Additionally, getting accountability and support from friends and loved ones, rewarding yourself for progress, and being patient and persistent can also aid in breaking bad habits.
8 Keys for Breaking Bad Habits!
- Identify the habit: Be clear about the habit you want to change.
- Understand the triggers: Identify the situations or emotions that trigger the habit.
- Find a replacement behavior: Find a positive behavior that can replace the bad habit.
- Make a plan: Create a plan to implement the replacement behavior.
- Get accountability: Find someone to hold you accountable for making the change.
- Reward yourself: Reward yourself for making progress towards breaking the bad habit.
- Be patient: Change takes time, so be patient with yourself.
- Stay persistent: Keep working on breaking the bad habit, even if you slip up.
True Motives for “Sorry, I Didn’t Mean It!”
When you are with a child or an adult, at some point you may be told, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to” or “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.” to hurt you.” And the child or person continues happily as if nothing had happened.
But if we didn’t mean it, why would we? Why would we dismiss our actions so easily with a casual comment? The underlying meaning of communication is its truth
When we hurt someone, why do we ease their pain by telling ourselves it wasn’t what we meant? It’s like the “I don’t know” response from a teenager, a cryptic comment meant to discourage further discovery. However, “I didn’t mean to do that” became so obvious that it was accepted as the truth.
Let’s look a little deeper.
Every action speaks louder and truer than our words. When our words don’t match our actions, it’s our actions that show our true motives. Famous words of the late Austrian psychiatrist Dr. Alfred Adler:
“Trust only movement. Life happens on the level of events, not words.”
The biggest causes of toxic behavior are unprocessed emotions, unconscious pain, and unmet needs. Perhaps “unintentionally” means that it was not caused by any conscious thought or motive. But when you look deeper, you often find hidden feelings and unmet needs that you haven’t yet recognized.
When we hurt others, we hurt ourselves. Unkind acts towards others can be an unconscious way of communicating our pain and sending out an SOS that we are hurt. It may have been a specific person.
Of course, hurtful words can inadvertently come to the side if you drink too much or if your self-control is wavering because you’ve lost your ability to control yourself cognitively due to your addiction.
But even in these situations, there are words that derive from the unresolved emotions and pain that emerge when impulse control is compromised.
In children, their ability to control themselves is affected by developmental immaturity and brain development. As such, it is the responsibility of adults to control their emotions and teach them how to express them in a healthy way.
My point here is to be more aware of your feelings and pay attention to your words, which can help you hurt or build healthy relationships.
Motivation for driving behavior
How many times has your spouse come home and yell at your children? Did they do it because they were mad at their children? Not normal. A difficult day at work or the emergence of unmet needs is far more likely to be the cause.
A child may come to school and push other children or teenagers around to bully them. Another student may be emotionally humiliated not because the person did something to them, but because of feelings of helplessness, misunderstood inner conflict, or unacknowledged hurt feelings. Unloving behavior does not make a person bad. It makes you human. Also, unkind behavior usually indicates a need for self-care and self-compassion.
In all personal growth and in all relationships, the key to loving ourselves and each other is recognizing the roots of our actions.
We continue to lash out, react emotionally, and inadvertently lash out at others until we realize the causes of our actions and their beliefs. To improve communication, we need emotional intelligence and self-awareness.
Sometimes we have bad days and need someone to understand us, even if we are misbehaving. It’s also important to be honest. It doesn’t matter what your feelings are. Taking our whims out on others is undesirable in any relationship. Increased confidence: mean what you say, say what you want to say
You may have heard this proverb. Great advice. Search your heart every time you hear yourself say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.”
Is there any reason you could have intended it that way?
Have you experienced unintentionally repressed resentment because you were unable to express your feelings directly? Has this person recently ignored you or said something hurtful to you?
Or maybe it’s as simple as canceling a dinner date, even if there’s a good reason for it…how to recognize our inner motives and find what we need
A fundamental stepping stone to consciously loving and empathizing with others is identifying when you are unloved. If you do or say something unkind, ask yourself later. Be more honest with yourself. )
Next, find out what you need to do to restore your peaceful self-esteem. You may want to apologize, put on makeup, or talk to the person about what’s bothering you. Or maybe you just need to be more in touch with your emotions and empathize with yourself. Either way, act as soon as you feel what’s right.
Every time I go through this process, I feel inner peace and less and less anger towards others. Self-esteem grows every time you make a conscious effort to understand your true motives, rather than immediately dismissing your actions. And each time we take action to fix what is holding back intimacy in a relationship, more respect, intimacy and understanding are built.
The next time you hear yourself say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to!” Dig a little deeper and find out if that’s true.